That First Crush

My first crush was on Ms. Sushmita Sen in Biwi No. 1. Do you think it is disgusting and absurd? I admit it is a bit. She still remains my first crush though never mind her age. But then, I didn't see too many movies when I was a kid growing up in the 1990s. So she was the first one whom I saw. I must have been about seven, but I watched the movie with my mother, so I guess my crush wasn't really age-appropriate. I like her looks, her tall height and most importantly, her acting mainly because she doesn't look plastic on screen. I still fantasize about being her husband and fathering her daughter.

My second crush was on Smita Patil--the face of the parallel cinema movement in which I am a firm believer of. Although she isn't alive today, I guess I've carried on the liking the same kind of sari-clad girls all my life. It must have set-off some kind of weird pattern I may still be unaware of. I am known to have the most weird choices that keep alternating every second day.

I'm not really into flirting, but I am a boy. I am also not into socializing for the heck of it and nor do I understand the concept of flirting around with girls. It seems so unreal and made up. My friends have different games that they keep playing but I am quite happy being single as of now. I definitely don't have the time to deal with people who are going to mess around with me. I'm so young (sixteen to be precise) that I don't have the time to commit myself. I personally feel that it is fun to be single since you are not tied down and yes, I do feel lonely at times though, when I wish I had someone to call or share things with. Like other boys, I cannot imagine myself with a girlfriend!!

Girls bring stability in a relationship, the affection that is required and more so they keep the relationship tied otgether, One can learn so much from an ordinary Indian woman's life. I know it is extremely hard to put it down on words. I certainly believe in getting married but it is important to tie the knot with the right person who makes you feel special.

The other day, I was talking to a childhood friend from IIT-Bombay who was like, "Why can't you get yourself a girlfriend?" I decided that I am going to write down a list of all things that I am looking out for in a girl and yes, I am not going to waste time with anyone who doesn't fit into my kind of a girl list. The list has everything from "I will not leave my clothes on the floor" to her morals and stuff. The most important things on my list are that she has to be tall, broad minded, so that she understands the lifestyle, but that she has to have other interests as well beyond work.

She has to be adventurous and should be able to teach me new things and must know to respect my parents and have a strong faith in me and my family. She should be able to laugh and yet be cute. She must also be able to adapt herself as and when the situation demands in our relationship. I know it is hard to find a girl who is as tall as Sushmita but this doesn't mean that I am looking for a girl as short as Rani Mukherjee. I also do need someone who has more of me either but I don't want someone who thinks less of me because then you really never feel being taken care of....


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